TRIGGER WARNING: The following post contains commentary denigrating to women and certain fresh vegetables. Please relocate to your safe space immediately. If you do not have a safe space or know what one is, continue reading. McDonald’s is announcing significant … Continue reading
Tag Archives: rant
My Facebook friends are very tolerant. My online persona is curmudgeonly, sarcastic, and outspoken. I have to work very hard to maintain this image since it’s so completely opposite to the sweet and unassuming person I am in real life. … Continue reading
“Fuck Lance Armstrong. Fuck him and his balls and his bicycles and his steroids and his yellow shirts and the dumb empty expression on his face. I’m tired of that asshole. And while you’re at it, fuck Tiger Woods too. … Continue reading
We live in an age of unprecedented freedom of expression. Despite lingering pockets of prejudice and repression, the majority of us consider ourselves to be reasonably open-minded, and this has allowed tremendous latitude among those who previously felt the need … Continue reading
History. We made history. My Republican friends are no doubt in a foul mood right now, so I want to speak directly to them. Democrats, you may leave the room. ______________________________ force break Hello there. I know you think I’m … Continue reading
I hate Apple. Hate it, hate it, hate it. I hate the fact that “iPod” has become a generic term. The correct term for such a device is PMP — Portable Media Player. Many companies make them, you know. The … Continue reading
“Flat fee my foot! I get residuals, or ye can hawk yer own goddamn cereal!” Is it just me, or are you getting sick of Shrek as well? The guy is everywhere. This marketing blitz is unlike anything I have … Continue reading
As a writer of random thoughts which are posted on the Web for all to see (all twenty of you), stories like this give me pause. A couple from the town of Thackthwaite in northwest England had read an article … Continue reading
I hate going to the post office. Maybe I’m wrong, but there had to be a time in the recent past when the post office wasn’t the local hangout for morons with loads of free time. I went to the … Continue reading
I am not a vain man. When I am wrong, I will gladly admit it. It’s simply not a frequent occurrence, and almost never happens now that I am no longer married. But, being a reasonable fellow, I’m willing to … Continue reading
Up until this point, I have chosen not to post any essays that are purely political in nature. I have two good reasons for this: first, that there are countless other sources of political coverage on the web, many of … Continue reading
Cilantro is a scourge on the planet. It is poisonous, nauseating, and the primary cause in over eighty percent of all cases of demonic possession. Chefs who cook with cilantro should be disemboweled with a potato peeler. Anyone who grows … Continue reading
I am rapidly losing patience with this low-carb business. All of a sudden, the poor carbohydrate has become Public Enemy Number One. One moment carbs are an integral part of the Food Pyramid, and now they’re considered about as healthy … Continue reading
I invite you to consider the greatest threat to human life on this planet. Back in the sixties, most people thought it was nuclear annihilation. In the eighties and nineties, it might have been AIDS. Today you might suggest terrorism. … Continue reading